1 09 2014

These lyrics have had a profound impact on my life this past week:

Hello, my name is regret
I’m pretty sure we have met
Every single day of your life
I’m the whisper inside
That won’t let you forget

Hello, my name is defeat
I know you recognize me
Just when you think you can win
I’ll drag you right back down again
‘Til you’ve lost all belief

These are the voices, these are the lies
And I have believed them, for the very last time

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I’ve been saved, I’ve been changed, 
And I have been set free
“Amazing Grace” is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King

I am no longer defined
By all the wreckage behind
The one who makes all things new
Has proven it’s true
Just take a look at my life

What love the Father has lavished upon us
That we should be called His children
I am a child of the one true King

So much of my life I built my life and identity on things other than who I am in Christ. I was a victim to circumstances…instead of having my mind set upon him and who he says I am.  There is an incredible video on Matthew West Vevo (located at

Don’t give you heart to another…

29 07 2012

We wrapped up our series at Westside Family Church on Evidence that Jesus was who he claimed to be – the Son of God.  Today Brian Phipps (our Next Steps Pastor) talked about how we need to forsake things that we run to when trials hit whether it be relationships, food, substances, pornography, approval etc.  I know in the past I have been an approval addict – I craved approval because I was teased while growing up because of a speech problem and it caused things to happen for which I had no control over but I also know that how I respond is MY responsibility and no one else.  I know God still has some healing to do BUT I also know I have come a long ways and I can’t allow people to put expectations on me and I can’t try to live up to the expectations of others.  I have gained so much FREEDOM the last few months when I discovered that I was trying to live up to people’s expectations and that is unhealthy.  I am in the best place I have been in a  long time.  Jesus is ENOUGH – he is more than enough.

  • Jesus says to the rejected – I LOVE YOU.
  • Jesus says to the hurting – I WILL HEAL YOU
  • Jesus says to the thirst – come to me and I will satisfy you!

Just some thoughts on this Sunday afternoon.


Summer 2012

28 07 2012

Summer 2012

North Carolina! Childress Vineyard!

Summer 2012

28 07 2012

Summer 2012

North Carolina!

Don’t listen…

28 07 2012

I entitled this don’t listen – but I encourage you to listen to your friends – the people who have your back even when you screw up (and I know I mess up a ton).  The people who encourage and love you when they see your faults and don’t ignore you instead they work through the conflicts. I heard a message one time from a pastor and he said “Consider the source’.  For example, would you put a lot of weight when a person who knows you barely criticizing you – my question is do they really have the right to say those things and let it get underneath your skin.  I hear that pastor whispering in my ear “consider the source”.  This is an example.  I just want to encourage you to really pay attention if you are listening to people instead of God –  I love this I got this from a 30 Day Campaign that Passion City Church is doing called Wide Awake to Who You are.  Each day I have gotten an e-mail that starts like this –  Good Morning… just wanted to remind you who you are in Christ:  God-designed, purpose-intended, significant, lavishly-loved, prince/princess, son/daughter of the King of the Universe and then it says receive his love by meditating on a verse and then reflect his love.   I believe we can’t truly love like God wants us to until we receive his love.  

I can think of so many situations lately where I have to say to myself “CONSIDER THE SOURCE”.  Is it true?   So my question to you and me is this WHO ARE LISTENING TO?  Are you listening to the God of the universe who loves you and when he points out sin – he is doing it out of love and wants you to grow stronger.  He has made you a MASTERPIECE.



You Lost Me…A Boook about the younger generation

18 04 2012

Here is a quote from a book I am reading and it made me go WOW!..

“When it comes to young Catholics’ and Protestants’ perspective about Jesus Christ, are the age group least likely to say they are personally committed to Christ.  While they have generally favorable views of Jesus, they also harbor significant doubt about the central figure of Christianity.  Young Adults are more likely than any other age group to belive that Jesus sinned, to doubt the miracles Jesus performed, and to express skepticism about his resurrection.  Despite their previous religious experiences, twentysomethings are the least likely to say they are confident that Jesus Christ speaks to them in a way that is personal and relevant to their circumstances.”


From You Lost Me..

I wanna to be an idiot (catchy title isn’t it )

12 04 2012

I heard a great message from the Pastor of Craig Groeschel and his topic was being an idiot for Christ.  At the beginning he reminded me that God calls the outcasts to make a difference in the kingdom and he uses people that have been with Jesus.  He discussed three things that idiots for Christ do:

1…They obey irrationally.  

He said they say yes even when it doesn’t make sense and he reminded us when God tells you to do something just do it – RIGHT AWAY!

2.  They give extravagantly.

He reminded us that EVERYTHING I have belongs to the Lord and that if the church got serious about giving how their won’t be a need in our community.  Look at Acts 4:34-35 – there wasn’t a needy person in that community.  Just a thought – how many single moms do we know?  How do we help them?  How many people do we know who are out of work – do we help them?   I want my generosity in all areas to go up.

3. Lastly, they believe what other’s say can’t be done.

How many of us shrink back because others say yeah right?  How many of us say yes but you don’t know how this hinders me?  Am I a big enough idiot to believe that God can use me right now in my brokenness.

One of my goals this year is to listen to more messages, to read more books, and to journal more.  I have some serious time to do this and am so grateful. I have some work to do and am so thankful for this season in my life.

Who do you say?

20 12 2011

I didn’t blog at all this fall.  I have been kind of hiding – busy with the youth up at Westside and then two life groups.  If I could pick one word to describe this fall it would be CHALLENGE…

  • A challenge to know what has my heart completely – who or what has captured my heart?
  • A challenge to knowing who I am – Who I am really?  Am I believing what others say or do I believe the one who created me?
  • A challenge to know who my true friends are – I went through a period of trial up until the beginning of November.

I think this fall was hard – was really hard but in November I was reminded that God is bigger than any challenge I am facing.  I was reminded that God has me completely and he only has good things in mind – he has good gifts for me if I look beyond the circumstance I find myself in.  I was reminded that if I draw near to God he will draw near to me.  What a thought as we approach this Christmas Holiday – that God came in the flesh to draw close to us.  We have a choice do we draw near to God or go in the opposite direction.  Do we surrender our will, our dreams, our wants and trust the one who says all things will work to the good of those who love him.  Yes, life stinks sometimes. Yes, life is hard.  Did I want to crawl in a hole and hid during a couple months absolutely but once again God proved himself faithful.  He is so faithful.  He is so good.    I believe that God is good…I believe that God is faithful…I believe  that God is love…I believe that when you trust him in the heartache and know he is in control – he gives joy and peace.  That is my story the last four months.  I am now in a season where I am to be quiet and listen – listen to what he is saying…listen to him say to me “I LOVE YOU and I have good plans for you”.  That is the God I have fallen deeper in love wiith this fall…

California Adventures…

12 07 2011


I had the opportunity a couple weeks ago to go to the Dream Center and serve. I really did not know exactly what this trip would be like.  My expectations were blown away…

The first day we were there we went to church and then to Hollywood Boulevard and went to the beach the first night for a teaching/worship time..


Kodak Theatre

The leader of the Group - Pastor John!

The second day we got up and went to San Monica Pier and then the students walked two miles to Venice Beach.  I stayed back and watched the students things.  I had a great time and got into a great conversation plus they made a great Sand Castle (which I don’t have a picture of!).  That evening we went to the Universal City Walk – we ate dinner and did some shopping (where I bought magnets – the don’t cost alot)

San Monica Pier


On Tuesday we finally went to the Dream Center and when we got their we went into a student service called the Movement.  It was a pretty cool service and at the end the teens who were apart of the program prayed with us and that really gave me joy.  We then went to the park and had lunch and I think we had more injuries during lunch then the rest of the week.  Here are a couple photos from the morning.

Justus and Colton - what were they doing? Rapping during the Movement!

We walked a ton of stairs on Tuesday - made me really want to be in shape 🙂

We ate lunch at this park Tuesday through Thursday!

The rest of the time I had the opportunity to take few photos and really am thankful.  I think my camera would have distracted me from what was going on around me.  The first day Tuesday afternoon and we cleaned the temple and I was with the crew that cleoaned windows but we got done fast so we had some time to talk to the men who were with us and one gave the most amazing testimony of what God has done his life, but the thing that stood out to me was a man laying on some grass.  You could tell he was homeless.  It really opened my eyes to the reality of what some of these people lived in!  That evening we went to the Youth Service called the Reach – it was very cool and again our students showed their courage by going up to the front!

Wednesday was a day where we got up and had service projects all day!  The morning my crew went down to the local gas station and cleaned car windows for free and the reactions were varied – from a questioning look to a sure I will allow you to do that…Here is a picture I toke that morning!

Washed Car Windows Wednesday Morning

I don’t have any pictures from Wednesday afternoon nor Wednesday night but I think these two outreaches are my favorite because we were serving and loving people.  Wednesday afternoon I went on the Food Truck and it was such a great feeling giving out food to those who really need it.  That evening we went to Skid Row and I was on the relational team.  Let me tell you the range of emotions I went through that evening – one of fear (to see all those people there and not knowing what I was going to be doing) to compassion and love.  I talked to a man who really showed me that those  people (alot of them – have a lot of hopes and dreams).  Wednesday was by FAR my favorite day of the trip.

Thursday I finally had Adopt a Block and had trash detail in the morning – We went to the neighborhoods around the church and picked up trash – it wasn’t glamorous but it was truly a service to the neighborhood.   In the afternoon we had Food Truck again and we went to hand out food and by far that was the biggest distribution that I toke part in.  I was able to pray for some people as well.

Friday we had our last project – I had out flyers to people who were walking to a bus stop for the Dream Center’s 4th of July party.  I had people who gladly toke it and people rushing by that they had no interest in it what so ever.  I am like that how often to do I rush around and don’t stop and look at the people right in front of me and their needs.  That afternoon we went to Huntington Beach and had our last team meeting.  In was an incredible time – the students shared what God did in their life.  Here are some photos…

Huntington Beach

The Last Team Meeting!

I will never look at people the same after this trip – I will see their eyes and the looks they give.  I will see the joy, the despair, the confusion, and not regretting their decisions.  It was a trip my heart got opened to the needs of the homeless.  It has been real hot in KC the last few days and a thought went through my mind – I wonder how the homeless survive in this heat and I wonder where they go.  I will never be same.

God did an amazing thing in my heart that weekend plus I got to know some of the students better.  WHAT AN AWESOME WEEK!


16 06 2011

You never know what a baby bunny can symbolize or make you think of…I ran across one tonight while I was going for a walk tonight around the Park that I live near.  I wish I had my camera and didn’t want to turn around and head back to the house and scare it away so I walked around the park and came home and grabbed my phone hoping that the bunny with it’s big ears and little body was still there but it wasn’t – I WAS SO DISAPPOINTED.  What good is my camera on my phone when I don’t have it on me.

While on my walk – God showed up.  I actually was still so I could listen – really listen to him.  He showed me that just as he gave the bunny life – he gave me a NEW LIFE.  Oh, how I like to slip back into old patterns of thought – those thought patterns that comes from years ago.  He whispered to me “I came to give you NEW LIFE…are you willing to accept it?”   I continued to walk but really started thinking about this question…and I pose it to you Are you willing to embrace the new life that Christ offers you just by accepting him? I think I will take more walks…I love the park near my house – it has some woods, a couple cool bridges, and a community swimming pool.  I am thankful that I stopped long enough tonight to hear from the one who loves me and created me warts and all : )

Psalm 46:10  He says, “Be still, and know that I am God”

II COR 5:17     “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:] The old has gone, the new is here!”