Meeting God in an Authentic Way

As I have been going to church the last few weeks – worship has become more important to me not the sound but the words and the attitude of my heart.  The worship is important because that where we meet God or one of the ways.  I heard it said once in college if you can’t sing from your heart don’t sing.  I was getting more and more convicted of this and saw that I was not connecting with God in worship at the campus I was worshipping at.  It’s not a matter of getting feed or the exciting songs but am I meeting God.  I changed where I worshipped and I love it – I can meet God and sing songs from my heart and that is the first time in more than six months.  I thank God for this move because that allowed me to worship from my heart.  He is a mighty God and he is waiting for his bride to come to him with an open heart and trusting heart.  Thank you for loving me!  Thank you for healing me! Thank you for saving me! 

This post comes from an overflowing heart tonight!

A New Old Conviction

This week God again reminded me of the need for me to disciple someone but until tonight I got discouraged because I was counting on my church having a minitstry and yet tonight I was reminded that it is MY responsibility and I can do discipleship or mentoring without having a program – all I need is someone who I see potential and ask them.  It is my responisibility.  God teach me and let me hunger for you.

What is God teaching you?

Six years ago…

It has been six years – six years ago this weekend I walked out of a church angry and hurt and questioning the leadership of the church.  Six years ago I walked into my current church and my current church has taught me a valuable lesson – NO CHURCH IS IMMUNE TO PROBLEMS!  Two years ago in April a big crisis hit my current church and I am truly excited where God is taking us.  It is because of God that I am there – not relationships even though I love those people but because I see God at work. 

This is not the purpose of this entry though – it’s about my old church.  I have been watching and seeing what has happened there since I left and yes I have heard and seen the problems.  It is in the public eye yet I dislike the hatred and bitterness that I see in some people’s lives who have left that church.  It hurts my heart because it is those people who are hurting not the church – the church is trying to take more ground for Jesus Christ and  as a Christian I will say go God!  God works through broken people and sinful people – Christians are not perfect we just have a God that loves us and forgives us if we ask him to forgive us.  I have a love for that church that only God has given me.   God is working there and pray that it will reach the community around that building. 

I will say what if the church was united in heart and would support other churches like it should.  What if indeed?   Words to the Church of Jesus Christ: DREAM BIG!  We have a God who says all things are possible with him. DREAM BIG!

IT’S TOUGH BEING A WOMAN!!!

Well, my blog has been very quiet lately…just been very busy and also sick with sinus infection plus my arthitis is acting up.  One of my fingers is very sore when I try to bend it – OUCH!  It doesn’t mean that I haven’t had things to say but I need to organize my thoughts better.  I just wanted to write some  thoughts down  which I got it from Beth Moore -  “God can’t turn a table that was never set against you” and this question “Am I strong or just spoiled?”  Are we strong because things are stacked against us or are we spoiled when we can worship in a free manner.

Here are the scenarios that Beth talked about during the study…

It’s tough being a woman…

1. In Another women’s shadow
2. Where beauty is a treatment
3. In a mean world
4. When we’ve been thrown a giant size weight
5. in the Tight fist of fear
6. Who can balance passion with patience
7. who  feels responsible for the how.

She unpacks each of these and how we can fight these situations during the Esther study and I would recommend it to any women.  I can’t believe it is over after next week.  I have grown up during these weeks and the one thing that stood out to me was how God turned the tables but he can’t until the table is set against us!

This weekend I will post one of my most heart felt posts on my former Life Group and how thankful I am for each woman who have been part of the Messer/Pockrandt life group the last three and half years!  Wow, what a ride!!!!  I will share some of the life lessons that I learned from this group and it all starts with being FAT!  I do want to be fat in this case!

Do you need to break free?

Last Tuesday, the leader of the Women’s Study for Esther read this and she sent it out today in an e-mail I thought it was worth sharing…

Beth Moore writes in her book Praying God’s Word these words concerning pride…

 

“Pride is not the opposite of low self-esteem.  Pride is the opposite of humility.  We can have a serious pride problem that masquerades as low self-esteem.  Pride is self-absorption with how miserable we are or how wonderful we are.  We are wise to be on the constant lookout for pride in our lives…My name is PRIDE.  I am a cheater.  I cheat you of your God given-destiny because you demand your own way.  I cheat you of contentment because you ‘deserve better than this’. I cheat you of knowledge because you already know it all.  I cheat you of healing because you’re too full of me to forgive.  I cheat you of holiness because you refuse to admit when you’re wrong.  I cheat you of vision because you’d rather look in the mirror than out a window.  I cheat you of genuine friendship because nobody’s going to know the real you.  I cheat you of love because real romance demands sacrifice.  I cheat you of greatness in heaven because you refuse to wash another’s feet on earth.  I cheat you of God’s glory because I convince you to seek your own.  My name is PRIDE.  I am a cheater.  You like me because you think I’m always looking out for you.  Untrue.  I’m looking to make a fool of you.  God has so much for you, I admit, but don’t worry.  If you stick with me you’ll never know.”

We will wait…

As I was watching the study tonight, It was all on waiting for the Lord.  It is tought to Wait on the Lord instead of waiting on a person or event.  I know it tough to wait but a point she made really struck me – sometimes we need to wait for the other person’s time.  God will prompt us not only when it is the right time for us but the other person as well.  It is tough – to wait – to be patient – it’s tough being a women when we have to balance between passion and people.  I thought of Lincoln Brewster’s song…Everlasting God (one of my very favorite songs):

Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord
We will wait upon the Lord

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won’t grow weary

Our God, You reign forever
Our hope, our Strong Deliverer
You are the everlasting God
The everlasting God
You do not faint
You won’t grow weary

You’re the defender of the weak
You comfort those in need
You lift us up on wings like eagles

I am truly enjoying this study and it also ties into what my Life Group is studying in Hosea as well.  I am thankful for not only this Bible Study on Tuesday but the Life Group I am a part of on Monday nights. 

 

Tight Fist of Fear

“And if I perish, I perish” – Queen Esther.

How would you react if you got a message where they are going to wipe out your entire race and you need to approach the person who ordered it? Of course, I would be scared to death.  That is the challenge that Queen Esther had and after she fasted and prayed for three days she was willing to go to the King with this saying – “if I perish, I perish”.

Beth Moore opened my eyes to the fact that fear sometimes determines what we do and don’t for the Kingdom.  I know that is true in my life and fears such as rejection and I might fail pop up in my head.  This week I really realized this truth in my life.  Moore made some good points in her video.  There were two points that really captured my heart and my head.  Esther had a choice.  Esther had the choice whether or not to approach the King.  I have the choice to face my fear.  I have the choice – I can determine the course I go.  Moore said we don’t have to do the same old thing.  I think about my heart and my passion and what I would love to do yet I don’t step up because I fear the answer “NO”.  What a chicken I am!  Moore said we can protect ourselves right out of our calling.  I know the next step for me.  I also fear the answer “GO FOR IT”.  I fear failure.  I fear falling on my face especially when it comes to ministry.  So, I have some growth in this area to do!  I have to overcome myself in order to do what God had created my to do.  God is so incredibly patient and loving towards me.

The next point is awesome – Esther took the courage she was offered.  Jesus offered us courage.  The question I have to answer in my life is – will I take the courage or will be held in a tight fist of fear?  I remember the story that Mark 6 has and how Jesus said “Take courage!  It is I.  Don’t be afraid”  If God really has called me to something – don’t you think he will make a way.

I pray that this lesson will change my life after all that is what scripture is suppose to do – change our life!

Beth Moore…IT’S TOUGH BEING A WOMAN!!! (PART 1)

I have joined this study up at WFC and to say the least it has really been a rich time in God’s word.  Each session has a statement It’s Tough being a woman…(you can see all the scenarios on my other page) but I would encourage you to listen to some if not all of the lessons and get the member book.  The times in the word during the week is rich.  For example, these are some of the statements in my homework (I am careul not to say to much because I want the women reading this to do this study!!!).

“Haman launched psychological weapons against the Jews, and we find ourselves in the crosshairs of the same weapon in the hands of our enemy who is trying to get back at God by attacking us.  Because Satan has a limited leash where believers are concerned, his most powerful tactics are psychological.  Though he can’t possess our minds, he profoundly and destructively influence our thoughts.”

A comforting thought…”The beutifully frustrating part of Satan’s insatiable bloodlust is that ultimately he cannot have what he wants.  In reality, he cannot destroy even one of us who belongs to God through Christ Jesus.  Satan is bereft of the power he wants most.  Even if he succeeded in murder, only our earthly bodies could be harmed.  In a metaphorical sense, we’d simply unzip them and walk free of their encumbrane and, in perfect health and vitality, step straight into the lives we were saved to live.   Gather this into your soul: When all is said and done, Satan can’t win and you can’t lose”

Wow!   I could go on but I really would like others to do this study and hear for themselves what God wants them to learn!  He truly has a destiny for all of us —-I will blog next Wednesday about what stood out this week in my homework.

A Journey through Exodus

In my reading through the Bible, I have gotten to the book of Exodus and there is so much depth to it.  I am just on the plagues but in 8 chapters there is a lot of meaning…how many of us quarrel with our maker – wanting to be something we are not (at least I struggle with this sometimes), what about hardening our heart toward something God encourages or leads us to do.  I am enjoying the journey.

I read a little bit of Psalm, Proverbs and New Testament each day.  In Matthew, the bottom line is faith – do you believe that God can do amazing things in your life and through you.  God invites us to journey with him and my challenge daily is to listen to him and let him lead as he sees fit.

This is one of those times in my life where I am hot not lukewarm and am very thankful.  Thankful for people who encourage me.  Thankful for people who tell me the truth not out of bitterness or rage but out of love. 

God is the God who provides for ALL our needs, God is the God who sees our heart, God invites us to surrender and become LORD of our life, God is our Banner the one who fights for us, God is the creator not only of the universe but the creator of each human being and has each hair of our head numbered, and this is the God I chose to worship….which leads to another entry another day – when you sing at church do you sing to the one who the lyrics are about or sing to the beat?  Why do you sing at church?  Another entry for another day….

Oh if you want an awesome study Do Lord, I want to know you by Kay Arthur.  I encountered God during that study…

The Year in Review and the Year ahead!

Alot has been going on this year in my life.  I had a great mentor, a challenge to resolve a conflict, a debate of where I should be and where I should serve. First on the mentor, we did a study on love – try to put into practice these words – do good to those who hate you, serve one another in love.  We also did a book on discipleship Disciples Are Made Not Born and I would encourage anyone who has a heart for discipleship to read this book.  Secondly on the conflict,  I had to approach someone that I had conflict with – hard and very uncomfortable.  I wanted to grow chicken feathers, but an encouraging voice said go.  I said it was so long ago – an encouraging voice said that being  obedient to God is worth it.  I had to come to a point prior to approaching this person I was comfortable no matter what reaction this person gave – I was and God was obeyed.  I left the results and am leaving the results to God.

Thirdly I have written lately about community and change and yet I feel like God is guiding me once again to stay put – he is saying this is a community where I am at work.  Does this mean that I won’t pursue new avenues to serve – NO!  I will serve where he wants – I know my heart is to mentor young people and to be honest I don’t see an openness in my current community for me to join and it hurts.  So…I am looking at joining up with an organization that first led me to Christ and softened my heart to God’s Word my sophomore year of High School.  I know God has called me to disciple others and it isn’t just a call – it is a matter of obedience….Jesus said, “Go and make disciples”  I think we focus sometimes so much on the going that we forget about the disciples.  God is going to complete his work in me and I am confident in that.  God wants me to follow through on my commitments for the next year (some goals: Read through the Bible, complete Phillipians memorization, and become truly a prayer warrior ).  God wants me to know he is in control of every detail of my life.  He wants me to have the proper perspective when the storms hit in 2009 – Keep my eyes on things above (Colossians 3). 

Psalm 115:1 -Not to us, O LORD, not to us  but to your name be the glory,  because of your love and faithfulness.